The heyday of dating apps is over, young people want to meet each other differently

This article was last updated on May 30, 2024

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The heyday of dating apps is over, young people want to meet each other differently

Nowadays, anyone who wants to find love quickly turns to a dating app. Bumble, Tinder, Happn, Breeze or Hinge: you can swipe in many places in the search for a partner. While the market value of the apps decreases, subscription prices increase. Meanwhile, people looking for a partner are also increasingly abandoning apps, sometimes even because of ‘date burnout’.

Match Group, the company behind forty dating apps, including Tinder and Hinge, saw its share price fall more than 80 percent compared to 2021, the year of the corona pandemic and the glory days of dating apps.

At Bumble, lower than expected revenue led to the resignation of the CEO last year, and this month to a new strategy. On the app that was known for only allowing women to send the first message, men are now also allowed to start a conversation.

Perverse system

Erinne Paisley, a dating app researcher at the University of Amsterdam, sees that apps are increasing their subscription fees. “Many dating apps don’t show you many people who really suit you, even though their algorithm knows who they are. For example, Hinge places people who really suit you behind a paywall.”

According to her, the apps are trying to push the boundaries to get people to pay more and more. “They are looking for a balance: they should not hide too many suitable matches, because then people will no longer want to use the app.”

Lizzy van Hees, journalist, single and one of the hosts of the podcast More and more singles, recognizes this. “At one point I had a paid subscription for a dating app. Then I received the following message: if I took out a more expensive subscription, in addition to an unlimited number of likes, I also got more visibility of my profile. Then I thought: what kind of thing is this? perverse system? That it only works if you pay more.”

Moreover, she wondered whether an app with a revenue model to keep her on the app for as long as possible wanted her to find new love. She has now deleted the app.

Racing clubs or dinner parties

The major dating companies Match Group and Bumble want to make more efforts on women and Gen Z. Dating researcher Paisley understands that, because she knows that Gen Z, the generation born between 1995 and 2010, is busy meeting people in different ways.

“Such as at running clubs or dinner parties. Young people are also skeptical about social media platforms, and therefore also about dating apps. For example, because they know that the algorithms of dating apps are often racist. Gen Z is therefore more inclined to delete dating apps,” says Paisley.

Dating app Bumble recently sparked outrage with a campaign targeting women who had quit online dating. Advertisements on billboards read, in part, “Thou shalt not give up dating and become a nun.”

This led to criticism. So it was in one viral post on TikTok: “Imagine being a female-friendly dating app telling women what to do with their bodies.” Bumble apologized.

Sometimes, after investing for a long time online, people suddenly no longer hear from anyone. That makes you despondent.

Lizzy van Hees, journalist

Through her podcast, Van Hees increasingly hears that people who do use the apps have few pleasant experiences. “That has to do with the time investment compared to what they actually get in return.”

According to her, it takes an average of 38 hours of swiping before you have a physical date, although that date doesn’t always happen. Van Hees: “Sometimes after investing for a long time online, people suddenly don’t hear from anyone anymore. That makes you despondent.”

Bumble even has a page about ‘dating burnout’. According to the app, such a burnout can be caused by, for example, the boredom of waiting endlessly for a match or the frustration of a bad date.

Romantic love

Journalist Van Hees is also critical of the dating apps: “There is such an inexhaustible source of profiles. That fragments your attention. You don’t think: I’m full, but you think: wait, who comes next?” Researcher Paisley emphasizes that it takes a lot of screen time. “Just seeing so many faces is tiring for your brain.”

Moreover, she argues, dating apps have tried to market romantic love differently. “No longer getting married, being together for a long time and warmth is romance, but the first moment with butterflies in your stomach. And because we had that first feeling for a moment, we want that again and again. But that is not romantic love. Romantic love takes time.”