Married Life: Decisively Indecisive

Many couples spend several years getting to know one another before biting the bullet and when they find themselves in front of an altar or a mandap, they believe they know everything there is to know about their partner. Then, reality bitch-slaps them!

My wife, who many argue is battery operated, finds herself exhausted easily and tends to nap in the afternoons. Being a considerate husband I often pop in to the room to see if she’s alright only to find her head sandwiched between two pillows, what I like to refer to as The Cave! During the first week, I lifted the top pillow to see if she was awake only to encounter the fury of bride-zilla! I took to crouching on the floor beside the bed to try and catch a peep down the pillow sandwich only to come face to face with my personal Eyjafjallajokull!

‘Every time! Every time I’m about to doze off!’ She began as volcanic ash spewed forth from her mouth (well it did in my mind!), ‘Every time!’
‘But baby, I…’
‘You know that one minute when you’re the most peaceful?’ She ignored my attempts to pacify her. ‘That one minute just before you’re about to sleep and you’re so happy! You always come in and wake me! You open the door, talk baby talk or open The Cave!’

I couldn’t help but chuckle! Bad idea, since my mini Eyjafjallajokull, enraged by my laughter, erupted another time and berated me further before slipping back in to the cave. I stood up to leave the room only to be stopped by a muffled voice;

‘Where are you going?’ She asked, barely audible.
‘I’m going out.’ I responded. ‘I won’t come in and wake you up anymore, 
sorry.’

From beneath the blankets and sandwiching pillows, Mrs. Bhojwani stuck out her tiny arm with fingers outstretched. Lifting up the top pillow of The Cave, she asked;

‘If you don’t come in, how will I know you care?’

Marriage Tip 9;

You’re damned if you do, you’re damned if you don’t.