3 Tips – Are Too Quick To Judge To Go On A Second Date?

This article was last updated on April 16, 2022

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3 Tips – Are You Too Quick To Judge To Go On A Second Date?

Question: 
I feel like I know instantly if someone is worth a second date, but people tell me I’m too quick to judge. What do you think?

Answer
As a matchmaker and dating coach to highly selective men and women, this question comes up frequently. There are three things to keep in mind.

1.       From your experience, how well do you think the guy actually knows you after just the first date?
It can be difficult to truly know another multi-dimensional person after just a single date. The process of getting to know someone can be analogized to peeling back the many layers of an onion.

2.        Instant chemistry may not be as great a tell-tale sign of potential as you might think.
At times, instant chemistry may be based on no more than repeating patterns from your past, some of which will not serve you well in the long-term.

3.        Also keep in mind that some men who may be great partner material are just not as great daters.

On extreme ends of the continuum, a player with a lot of dating practice, motivated to tell you exactly what you want to hear, may very well make a better first impression than a less experienced commitment-minded guy who may just be nervous during a first interaction.
Bottom line is that you may be missing out on some great potentials by limiting your assessment of a guy’s potential exclusively to what you learn during your first interaction.

Brief Bio.

Jasbina Ahluwalia is an Indian-American attorney turned entrepreneur, Relationship Expert, Radio Show Host and Matchmaker / Dating Coach.

She is the Founder & President of Intersections Match, the only Elite Personalized Matchmaking & Dating Coaching Firm in the country serving Selective Singles of South Asian descent Nationwide in the U.S. 

Jasbina is also the host of Intersections Talk Radio, a monthly holistic lifestyle show – conversations with published authors/experts on relationships and health and wellness.

For more information, please visit www.IntersectionsMatch.com. Feel free to submit a Question to be considered for this column to Jasbina directly at Jasbina@IntersectionsMatch.com.