With two days before we head back to London I have to admit that not only have these 5 weeks in Lagos been a learning experience but they’ve been better than I expected. Sure, I suffered through yet another ear infection and the flu but all in all time did fly by and Mr.B told me exactly that and yes, he was right yet again. In fact, I even told him that I would miss Lagos at which point he reached across the bed, checked my temperature before calling the doctor on the phone and stated that either I’ve had an overdose or the ear infection has spread to my brain.
In spite of how much my father dislikes Lagos he said it would be a good learning experience and he too was right! Besides starting to cook and figuring out how to deal with a thieving maid I faced and overcame numerous unusual obstacles that I could never have ever imagined. For instance, never would I have thought I’d be faced with grown Nigerian men incessantly touching their privates like little children in mid conversation! 5 weeks later, I’ve built up a tolerence to that too! However, the fact that they refer to my husband as ‘Fine Boy’ while touching their crotch still hasn’t settled in. I also found some of them to be quite dramatic with their stories, hand gestures and need to keep saying ‘Before Man and God!’ when trying to make a point!
I even managed to pick up a little of the local lingo. For instance when you want to say ‘wow’ the appropriate manner is ‘Na-wow-o!’. If you’d like to say you don’t want any trouble you’d say ‘I no want wahala o’. I also eventually understood when a Nigerian asks for ‘Dicks’ he is in fact asking for a ‘Disc!’ But the highlight had to be when I saw a native hazardously running across the road as cars sped by and someone screamed out;
‘Take time! Life never get duplicate o!’
As funny as ‘Pigeon Philosophy’ might be you have to admit it’s profound! My trip to Lagos has truly been an enlightening experience where I’ve met some lovely people, seen a new part of the world and witnessed the African in my husband. Thank you Lagos, next stop….London!
Marriage Tip No. 33:
Nawowo for marriage o! It de take you plenty places you no sabi imagine! Enjoy for life no get duplicate! Before man and God, No Wahala, God forbid!
Welcome to our Nigerian Marriage!
Happy Diwali 🙂
About the author:
Born in Africa, Chandru grew up between Nigeria, India and the UK. With a Masters in International Business from the University of Westminster, he moved to New York where he worked as a Business Development Manager for three years. In 2002, he returned to Nigeria where he currently resides and runs a trading company. Chandru has been writing for Beyond Sindh (www.beyondsindh.com) since 2004 and has published numerous articles in the quarterly publication. His story entitled ‘The Love Letter’ won the Mirage Book short story contest and was published in an anthology titled Inner Voices in January 2009. His short story ‘Zero’ is scheduled to be published in the anthology Indian Voices towards the end of 2010.
In December 2009, Chandru’s first novel, ‘The Journey of Om’ was published in India by Cedar Books.